“...Anyways, let's just go ahead and get to everybody's favorite cartoon show, and I'm talking about 'My Little Pony'. The first episode of Season two, 'Return of Harmony', really kicked ass. It was ridiculous! Good Lord! I actually liked this disgusting, sick, twisted, Discord!”
A splicer is a term coined by Ghost to someone who cuts and pastes individual segments of his voice to make it sound as though he said something he did not. Splicing is one of the most popular methods of trolling Ghost and also one of the most effective.
The word splice means: to join or connect, via two interweaving strands, in this case, audio files.
The audio splices began shortly after the soundboard craze during May 2011. Audio Splices had existed before but weren't very common. One of the first and most well known splices edited Ghost's voice to say:
"...And to all you assholes who say that I'm racist, hey, it's the truth!"
This rage-quit inducing splice opened the floodgates to many more splices, which were either poorly or cleverly made by the legions of bronies and trolls, of subjects ranging from Sarah Palin to pedophilia. Ghost initially did not have a solid name for them, referring them to any number of things, such as 'radio splices', 'idiots' augmented audio files' or simply 'soundboards' again, but the name gradually stuck by August 2011. Amusingly, Ghost would often claim any unfavorable sound clip of him was an edit, even to things he actually said (though out of context) - such as the 'Strap On' clip. The most frequent splicer of this early period was DiscardSkype, who frequently was called on first for Radio Graffiti to play his newest editing exploits.
Most splices are made in a program called Audacity. Clips of what Ghost says are taken from the Blog Talk Radio archives of the True Capitalist Radio (or sometimes live off the air) and mixed together to "put words in Ghost's mouth". The key is to get clips of Ghost using the same tone of voice and speed so that it sounds natural; the goal being to make it sound realistic.
One interesting tactic used by talented splicers is to "seed" the Chatroom or Twitter with innocent-sounding usernames that Ghost won't immediately take offense to, and then later on to "harvest" sound clips of Ghost saying those names to use as part of a splice. Since Ghost doesn't always get through the whole shout-out list, the technique requires patience. (i.e, the Angry Racist Jewish Hambone splice).
Some callers have begun making splices of other people, Donald Trump most commonly, using clips from speeches and pitching together the word 'Ghost'. These make Ghost rage not just for insulting him, but for besmirching 'his man' in that sort of fashion.
Quality of Splices
Splices are intended to sound as if Ghost actually said it. Splices that sound like words he actually said are very high quality. However, this does not mean that an obvious splice is poor quality (see below for an example). In fact, on several occasions they have made Ghost 'cans' and even rage-quit the show, simply because of what the splice consists of. There are, however, 'poor man's splices', which are typically done too fast/slow, sound nothing like Ghost's voice, or probably made using Windows Movie Maker. A good example of one of these would be this video. (If this is you, please click here).
Recently, Ghost has come out in critique of overly long splices which demand too much attention from the listeners with little payoff, especially if the splices in question have poor audio mixing or quality. Many of Ghost's listeners agreed with the sentiment.
Splices are now a very common type of troll on True Capitalist Radio, and as of the Return, have arguably declined in effectiveness due to the sheer number of them that are played on the show. Ghost has crafted a stock response line to them, usually involving the phrase "I never said that you sorry sacks of crap! That's an audio splice, God-damnit!" or some variation, and calling for "Punitive Damages" to the perpetrators. Good quality and the timing of a call are typically the breaking factors that cause Ghost to cans.wav.
Types of Splices
Over the years there have been many different types of Splices featured on Ghost's show. The most frequent
type of splice are the splices that put words in Ghost's mouth making him say racist, sexist, sexual (especially homosexual) and things that are the exact opposite of his political views.
Since the Return, another type of splice has become increasingly popular. This splice is the Story Splice a type of splice in which a small story is created using splices of Ghost's voice often mixed without outside elements, such as him conversing with characters from other shows or with the characters on his own show.
Frequently Spliced Phrases
The quotes that are spliced are frequently taken from frequently repeated Ghost phrases or one-time things, such as disaster-related quotes.
- It will be legal in Texas to shoot (X, for example someone Ghost likes such as Trump) from helicopters, bam bam bam, shooting these sons of bitches, ha ha ha ha
- I happen to have a whole bunch of (X, for example "slaves") who happen to be (y, original "black")
- This comes from a rant on Melting Pot of Friendship in which Ghost claims he is not racist because he has plenty of friends of different races
- (X lead-up removed "Sarah Palin") is a good piece of ass
- In the original Ghost is complaining that people vote for Sarah Palin mostly because they find her sexually attractive and that if she wasn't attractive she'd have no voters
- IF YOU'RE A TRUE AMERICAN, IF YOU'RE A REAL AMERICAN PATRIOT, (word "don't" removed) VOTE FOR (X, someone Ghost dislikes, ie. Sarah Palin)
- In the original Ghost was advocating to NOT vote for Sarah Palin
- (x, basically anyone) Take ten steps (y, "towards") my buttcrack
- In the original Ghost told the Internet Buttstalker to "take ten steps away from my buttcrack"